i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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