Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize