Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
