When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
You pole danced in your parka.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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