i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize