During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
