My brain says no but my pants say off.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize