We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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