you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
