oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
he had hair everywhere except his balls
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize