I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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