Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
