when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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