Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Randomize
