doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize