if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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