So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
