A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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