Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
