ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
