To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
