): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
last night I used snow as a chaser
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
