there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
