i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
