uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
