My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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