she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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