Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Less talking, more tequila
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
This is the high leading the old right now
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize