I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
