it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
