You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
