Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
