you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
