i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
