I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
