I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize
