so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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