so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
