Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
