he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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