I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
We're facebook friends in real life
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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