I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Randomize
