eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize