..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
