I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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