Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
