What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
