i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize