how can u be prego again
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Randomize
