I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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