You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
