do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
there was a trapeze. enough said
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
